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Post by Tess›››xo on Feb 10, 2009 15:35:11 GMT -5
the devil is alive, i feel him breathing To any other horse, it was quiet. Exceedingly so. But to some, the air heavy with noise and the irritating sounds clawing at your ears. It wasn’t hard to hear, if you took the time, or were careful enough. The morose drone of the crows, the snap of the twigs as hooves were dragged across their brittle skeletons, the distinct sweep of the air as a sudden gust of wind blew through the grass. It was barely audible, only heard if you concentrated like hell. Most wouldn’t bother. If it was so quiet, wouldn’t that mean it wasn’t worth hearing?
Apparently, that was not true. If the sweetest music in the world was too quiet, would you avoid listening to it? If the greatest truth of all was too small to read would you stop trying to read it? The point was, if you gave up on something, and didn’t look studiously at every detail, you would miss extraordinary things. Or miss the part where it all went wrong, and you would fail to fix it.
Lexus felt the land breathing around her. It wasn’t hard. It was old, weary, heaving great sighs, bones creaking ominously. The balance between the mean, harsh tone that the area had adopted, and the comforting loneliness of the place was a little disconcerting. It felt as if this was a place that had never been touched, but that couldn’t be true. There were hoof prints all over the place, mixed, confused scents left behind by horses that had come and gone, and blood spattered in some places. Still, Lexus felt slightly inclined to mooch around here for a bit. It seemed… safe, in a sense. There were obviously equines passing through this way, and at least one of them had to be intelligent enough to strike up a meaningful conversation. Or, at least, give her someone to moan about her tragic circumstances at.
The dark bay slowly plodded along, natural Andalusian grace diluted by her weariness, and general depression. Her 15 hand frame worked in a machine-like way, muscles grinding underneath her chocolate coat, and legs pushing her along, taking in the monotonously normal land. Save for that large crack, that split right through the land, occasionally sending out a cloud of steam, pregnant with moisture, making the mare in question jump automatically. It was interesting, how nervous she was. She had been a laid-back, incredibly relaxed filly. Had been.
There was no point dwelling on the past but it was one of Lexus’ favourite hobbies. She pitied herself, undoubtedly, and bringing up the topic that made her so unhappy almost made her crack a smile. She was interesting like that. Most would choose to clam up. They wouldn’t dare mention their past, and would eat you if you tried to ask. But Lexus, nah, she was much too important to be like everyone else. After years of seeing other horses try and fail to be happy, she decided it was time to give up on cheeriness altogether, and the pretty 4 year old was wrapped up in her own little bubble of self absorption. It almost made you a little sad, to see a young, healthy female so intent on not being happy.
The truth was, she could be happy if she wanted. She didn’t want to be, though. The mare’s features had been contorted and diluted, Andalusian blood mixed with native breeds to give her a slightly thicker appearance, but with all the usual appeal of the breed that mainly made up her bloodlines.
The air was so thick with sound it was almost tangible now, to Lexus. She shook her carved head, eyelids closing over her vacant brown eyes, probably looking like she was stoned. But she didn’t care, to be honest. And maybe if she spoke to someone, being deprived of conversation for so long, she would brighten up.
Not likely.
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Feb 11, 2009 13:49:24 GMT -5
take my DARKESTfears
[/color] and play them like a l u l l a b y, like a reason[/color] WHY.[/center][/font][/size] The day was overcast, swollen clouds and spits of rain casting grey shadows across the knife-edged grass. The wind was light, but it was also biting, keened by currents from the north. There was a little sun, but it was a pale, bone-brittle thing which radiated little heat or light.
Ruben walked under the shade of a narrow fringe of trees, ears curving to the soft thrum of the leaves overhead and the melancholy creak of bark and branch. His mud-encrusted hooves dragged carelessly across the tangle of slippery roots and occasionally he stumbled, only to right himself with an irritated snort. His lean, rough muscles rolled dimly beneath his sunkissed coat; a petal of blackish-red was visible at the corner of his mouth - a reminder of his latest run-in with Leo. Bastard.
The palomino ducked his head, snatching with unprecedented ferocity at an itch upon his shoulder. He was aching all over, and this dim, lonely trudge through an abandoned field was doing nothing to improve his temper. The fine, mizzling rain was clinging to his eyelashes, streaking dark in his mane and along his hindquarters: it made him shiver, though his coat was thick and he was not particularly cold.
The trees came to an end and Ruben stepped out into the open, chocolatey eyes swerving this way and that. It suddenly occured to him how very pathetic it was for him to still be wandering round this god-forsaken place on his own. Silk was no doubt playing happy families, and him? He had nothing. Morosely he began to wonder if there was any point in him being there at all, but he broke this train of thought off quickly. It had occured to him earlier that he had become ever so slightly self-absorbed, and that a positive approach might be more effective. Yes. Positive.
He blew through his lips heavily. It was, he mused, easier said than done. It wasn't as if he had oodles to be positive about, after all: what did he have apart from a half-crazed friend (he still hadn't quite forgiven Silk for the bite) and a strange love affair with a toothy Dark? Despite himself, Ruben found his lips twitching at the thought.
At this point the palomino found his eyes wandering away to the left, where miraculously they discovered the form of a bay mare, ambling some little way away. She looked, Ruben decided, vaguely rat-arsed: he tilted his head to survey her better, curious. There would have been a time when he was wildly concerned, but now there was nothing but mild interest. He was too absorbed by his own problems to pay real attention to anyone else's.
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Post by Tess›››xo on Feb 19, 2009 15:12:52 GMT -5
Drizzle coated her back in a fine sheet of reflective moisture, grey light emitted from the clouds and weak rays of sunlight bouncing off her spine. Lexus’ feet were doing the thinking now, wheeling her towards the clump of bare trees, and she didn’t stop them. Her legs were guiding her in large, open strides, fluidly taking her from one dirty, grassy patch to another, Andalusian style seeming to come back to her now. Her cracked lips opened, gasping slightly, as a distinctly masculine scent wafted her way.
In a flurry of mane and tail, she whipped round, twisting her body to scan the covered area quickly, eyes darting from one side to the other, She looked psychopathic, ears pricked expectantly, dark form a small blot on the tip of the hill. Again, her crack lips parted to rumble out a whinny that had a foreign quality to it, like an accent, underneath the soprano tones, that was so heavy with regrets from the past you couldn’t ignore it.
There was a lucid moment in her frenzy, when she saw herself, getting excited, and pitied herself, more so than usual. Here she was, getting all in a flutter over some weedy looking stallion, who unwittingly, stumbled across a neurotic mare, hell bent on finding somebody to talk to and share her problems with that were many in number. Her bottom lip trembled, but it wasn’t visible to the naked eye. She was a statue, held on the spot, muscles contracted, every inch of her slim body still. This was stupid. Why was she here?
She had always craved attention, and chased after other equines, be them mortal enemies, or mere acquaintances. But this, this was taking it to the extreme! From a distance, you couldn’t see this manic action, and the unsuspecting Ruben probably wouldn’t be subject to this show until Lexus got much closer. Which she intended to, being the poor, needy little soul that she was, supposedly.
She shook her head again and trotted forward, evidently ignoring her temporary sanity, and deciding to return to her former state. It was probably not the wisest of decisions, but then, Lexus was not widely known for her intelligence. Her eyes glazed over, kept on the bony male before her, studying, analysing, reading his every move, and scrutinizing his posture. He looked… Boring. Plain and simple, boring. The hypocrite of a mare covered the large hill in several large, elongated strides, and gracefully tackled the descent towards the trees, navigating her way around the roots and stones that burst from the harsh ground.
A intensely bright, while bordering on maniacal grin was plastered on her face, and it was unclear whether it was sincere in its purpose to create a comfortable environment, or whether just to be there, a pretty face for a rather ugly interior. Lex was odd. Increasingly so as the weeks of solitude went by. But if she was truthful was mystery. More to herself than anyone else. And her ability to be honest would be tested with new meat in sight.
“Hi,” she said, an expertly crafted smile now rippling through her features, a contrast to her former, madcap grin. Her tone was pleasantly warm, and she was careful not to let it drop to a depressed monotone.
Claimin' money is the key so keep on dreamin'
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Mar 18, 2009 13:58:13 GMT -5
As he watched the mare, an indistinct smudge of brown and black through the mizzle, Ruben realised that he was lonely. Well, it wasn't exactly much of a realisation. He had been lonely for a long time, after all. No herd, no life, no warmth in the cold night. It seemed an age since he had been young and handsome, when he had been careless, carefree, when he had had so much power beneath his unsuspecting hooves. He was not old now, of course. But it had all been such a long, long time ago.
Positive, damnit.
The palomino shook his head, snags of creamy forelock curling against his cheeks and forehead. One hoof was lifted from the squelching mud, carefully, deliberately, falling into the motion of a loose walk. He watched the mare's face carefully as he came nearer, watched the pantomime of expression that raced neatly across it. A little twist of uncertainty settled in his stomach. God, why was he always landed with the nutters? He had a talent, clearly.
Even so, he had no desire to be bitten again. Mares, Ruben had decided, followed no line of reason or logic: they were the most difficult and perplexing lumps of flesh in existence, and he had long ago given up any semblance of trying to understand them. He only ever seemed to get mauled or patronized when he tried, or else abandoned on the slightest whim. His lip curled ever so slightly, but he carried on walking forwards. Hell, a horse was a horse - he wasn't going to start being picky.
She was very pretty. He noticed this, then immediately felt annoyed for doing so; the stallion ground to a halt a few strides away, his stocky, compact body contrasting starkly with her lithe and elegant one. She was smiling, and Ruben found his lips curling upward also: he was still polite, after all. Now it came to it, though, he hadn't realised just how rusty he was. Rusty at talking. Fucking brilliant, Ruben. Maybe you could entertain her with your goldfish impression? And now he was talking to himself. He really had been sulking too long.
He'd always thought himself very good at talking, but in hindsight Ruben saw that he'd just slung together a couple of smart-sounding words, with a few lo's and m'lady's in between, and it had been swoon-worthy vocabulary. Now, however, with his appeal seemingly down the drain, it looked like he was actually going to have to put some personality behind it. Which might well pose a problem, seeing as he wasn't even sure he had any.
His dark, vaguely disconcerting eyes hovered over Lexus, made jewel-bright by the beads of moisture that clung to his eyelashes. God, why did it take so much bloody thought just to say hello? "Hello." Tada! So very hard? "Sorry if you're looking for decent conversation. I'm bollocks at this." Damnit, had he said that out loud?
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Post by Tess›››xo on Mar 21, 2009 17:24:02 GMT -5
He was short, stocky – efficient. Whereas she was lean, and long – not very suitable for living out here. But still, she got by, and by god, she looked good doing it – or so she hoped. She wasn’t drop dead gorgeous, and her looks weren’t something she prided herself on. No, she was pleasant. Pleasantly warm, pleasantly pretty, pleasantly intelligent. Pleasant, dull, simple. A figure that was probably going to fade into non-existence, instead of dying. That sounded much more exciting than just dying, but even so, it happened to those little background figures, the ones that didn’t have a starring role in their own life stories.
It was a deeply philosophical matter, and one that Lexus had decided not to bother her self with. She had better things to be doing – like analysing palomino stallions, for instance. Lexus kept her eyes firmly set on him, his form becoming blurred and vague if she kept her eyes open without blinking too long in the light drizzle. She ended up blinking furiously every couple of seconds, and it was ever so slightly irritating.
He wasn’t ugly. No, he wasn’t. He was pleasant as well; but Lexus doubted he was quite as pleasant as she was herself. At least, in their personalities. He was probably sparky, bright, happy – fixable. Or, it was possible, he was another twisted thorn in the side of the aesthetically perfect equine world. A useless lump of flesh that floated about writing the book of Ruben; another weirdo loner, simply. That was a comforting thought. It was hard to make conversation if you had nothing in common. That was maybe the reason why Lights and Darks never got on. They were too different. Ah, it seems it was the epiphany happy hour, here in Dreaver. How many other realisations would drag themselves into the horses’ minds’ eyes?
As he spoke, Lexus tried not to smile again, she just nodded, slowly. He seemed to be a thorn. “It’s okay. I’ll probably be very socially awkward – being alone is great practice for the real world.”
She couldn’t stop her intensely surprised expression popping up on her face. She sounded normal. Not pleasant, or boring, or thorn-like. She was good at talking! I’m good at talking! She smiled, happily, the smile reaching her dull eyes. She cocked her head to one side quizzically, and as she did so, another though popped into her head. Your name. Short and sweet, as ever.
“I’m Lexus, by the by. I’d say it’s a pleasure to meet you, but truthfully, I dunno that yet.” There was a silly sense of hysterical pride rising up in her, and she fought to restrain the burst of giggles that wanted to slide up her through and out into the open air. It would make a very loud echo, and would seem extremely rude. She wasn’t a bitch. Lexus was polite and in no way canine.
Seriously, are you bloody kidding me?
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Mar 30, 2009 15:14:01 GMT -5
It looked like he hadn't blown it with his eloquent introduction. Lucky him. Either she was used to miserable bastards, or she was one herself: oddly, Ruben was curious to find out. Maybe they could wallow in each others' sorrows for the next half hour. He needed a new misery-friend, now that Silk had discovered her heart's desire, again. The palomino blew out sharply, clearing the self-absorbed train of thought from his mind. No wonder he'd fallen so far.
Ruben found himself watching Lexus, strangely mesmerized by her spasmodic blinking. He had no idea what she was trying to do, but the sight of her focusing and re-focusing upon him brought a gentle little smile curving across his lips. She was different. Or was that just because he had only been looking at himself for so long? He shifted his weight, coarse muscles jarring beneath his beaten-metal coat. He was painfully aware of every move he made.
Her words caused him to relax a little. "Isn't it just." The words came a little easier now, completely meaningless, pointless to have said, but the harsh, uncomfortable edge to his voice had faded. "But the real world is a bloody ridiculous place to live in." It was said more to himself, without him ever having contemplated saying it: Lord, where was this word vomit coming from?
She smiled again, like she had just discovered something amazing. Ruben tilted his head, more curious than ever, but now with a few more strands of caution threaded in; it had been a while, after all, and he wasn't so sure about how to interpret other horses these days. But smiling was generally good, and she was smiling a lot. Then again, Leo smiled a lot too: the thought of the lanky piece of scum twisted a fresh scowl across the palomino's lips.
"Ruben," he replied, dropping his head a fraction. It wasn't a bow, exactly - more like the muscles in his neck where aching like hell. He looked away from her, briefly, eyes panning out across the stretches of dreary space, of sodden grass and wrung-out sky. A pleasure he doubted it would be. He just wasn't interesting anymore. "So, Lexus," he turned back to her suddenly, eyes questioning, mouth halfway formed into a smile, though there was little warmth in it. "How did you find yourself in this back of beyond?"
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Post by Tess›››xo on Apr 3, 2009 14:08:07 GMT -5
“God, tell me about it,” she answered morosely, rolling her dull brown eyes dramatically. Although the real world is hardly ever realistic, she added, mentally. It would make little sense if she said it aloud, but in her mind, it made perfect sense. And it would stay tucked safely away in her mental safe, because, although she didn’t really mind that she was blinking like a mad woman, she did mind what she said – and she wasn’t going to look like a complete freak. Not yet, anyway.
Ruben. That sounded nice – normal, not fancy shmancy, two word, random adjective paired with mismatched noun nonsense. Not that she would know what adjectives and nouns were. She still knew when words didn’t fit together, and quite often, when she met horses, their names wouldn’t roll off the tongue easily. They’d be harsh, and scary names, not names you want rolling off your tongue, unless you were crazy. If you were saying their name, it usually meant you had said something to them, and that’s not something you want to do.
Lexus’ eyes stayed dull, but a small smirk painted itself on her lips. Not a coy one, or a nasty one. No, just a small smile, that couldn’t be bothered to turn into a grin, or was simply satisfied with sitting their, looking the teeniest bit happy. Bloody hell, she was sad. She was analysing her own smiles and blinks and any blooming movement she could see herself making, in the past, in the future. She wasn’t paranoid, just meticulous about what image she was sending across, although, more often than not, it was that of a grumpy stallion much older than her.
Now she was a little self conscious about her relaxed stance, ears casually flicking backwards and forwards. Wait, no, why should she care how nonplussed she looked, when he was standing there, hunched up like a bag of spuds? With the expression of one too – blank. Actually, that wasn’t true. There seemed to be a faint spark of curiosity lighting up his eyes now. Hey, maybe he was going to ask her about her past. Brilliant!
Nope, just a boring old no-drama question on how she found herself here. But hey, that wasn’t no drama. She had followed her friend here right? Right. She wasn’t about to go telling him that, she didn’t want to seem like a crazed stalker, but there was a small glimmer of satisfaction in her smile now, having been reminded that she was indeed special, and unique, and amazing. Yes. She was.
“Oh, you know the usual, wandering loner, dramatic past, yadda yadda yadda.” She smiled, jokingly, her eyes mischievous, but inside, she wanted him to raise his eyebrows coolly and ask about her troubled past. He might not live to see the end of it, seeing as how elaborately she would tell it, but it would be a story he wouldn’t forget. And in Lexus’ world, exaggeration wasn’t a crime – it was a creative outlet. “You?”
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Apr 3, 2009 15:58:08 GMT -5
Ruben blinked, and his ears quivered ever so slightly. So maybe she wasn't just your average serene, oh-look-at-the-butterflies mare. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing: in his experience if mares weren't wet, they were completely unpredictable. Still, he'd stick around for moment, just as if there were a dozen other places he could be but he was deciding to spend his time with some random mare. Just as if he still had some fragment of a life.
He hadn't actually been all that interested in the answer when he'd said the question. Oh, where had those fabled listening skills meandered away to? He'd have to rediscover them pretty quick, if he wasn't to come across as even more of an emo, brooding, sulky old git than he was already being. And why did he have to think about everything so much, anyway? Life would be so much simpler if he could've just stopped his brain from functioning.
"How shocking," Ruben replied, with a grating chuckle. If he met a horse who wasn't harboring a deep and deadly secret it would be a first. Everyone just seemed so damn tormented these days, overshadowed by some ugly mother of a past. Bit hypocritical there mate. "And I guess you're the type who's about to give me an intriguing and thoroughly charming account of just how many of your relatives have died horribly?" Well that was somewhat uncalled for. The palomino ground his teeth, eyes flitting away.
"Sorry." He raised his eyebrows cooly. "Feel free to tell me about your troubled past." Ruben breathed out, slowly, the fine rain flurrying about his streaming breath. The sun would occasionally break through the banks of clouds, its frail caress a crude imitation of warmth. What was he doing here? He really had no fucking clue. "Me? I used to own this place and everything in it, would you believe." He grinned, teeth white against his dark muzzle. "Well. Bits of it, at any rate."
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Post by Tess›››xo on Apr 4, 2009 15:02:52 GMT -5
“Very, very shocking. And I would tell you how many of them have died, if I actually knew.” Her eyes glinted mischievously, but it wasn’t playful, or humorous – it was kind of empty, acted out, although you would have to pay very close attention to realise it. “I’m much more interesting than that.” She chuckled, another hollow sound, exactly the way it was when she had been a filly, the very first noise she heard after she had woken up, stumbling, drunk on uncertainty. She was reminded, faintly, of the way she had tripped around the whole bloody land, looking for them, and then, finally, fell to the ground, shaking, breaking up into small, irreparable pieces, that would never fit into their slots quite the same way.
Like hell that was going to happen to her again. She would never make friends, or enemies, or things that she could lose – in the end, she would simply fade away, like a soldier, she would not die. Loneliness would consume her and make her an unnoticeable speck on the face of the earth, not unique, or interesting, like she was no (apparently). And that suited Lexus just fine.
“Really, you find tales of gruesome deaths charming? You’re very odd, Ruben.” She mentally added on former king, to her reply, smirking again, that same, lazy-assed smile. He didn’t really seem the leading type, but who was she to judge? She didn’t know him, of course. With help, she never would – if he started talking again, she could blank it out, coming out of that comatose state to nod and frown once in a while, acting like she truly cared about the woes of former king Ruben. A light bulb sprung into her mind’s eye, and if she had fingers, you she would snap, shouting “Eureka!”
“Used to? What happened? If you don’t mind telling me,” she said, hesitantly. No, I she seemed like she cared, he might think that she was some lovely, normal horse, thick as pig shit, but still normal, and prompt her again to tell him her story. And then she would sigh, and say, “Well, if I must…” It would work out wonderfully, as long as this specimen in front of her played his part right. Not that he even knew about the script that was currently running through Lexus’ mind.
She smiled encouragingly, but it was still a bland expression, and nodded, as if he needed some reassurance. Pfft. She was pretty sure he would be completely fine with talking about himself. [/size]
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Apr 5, 2009 17:34:41 GMT -5
She was... confusing. She laughed and smiled, but the expressions were somehow dead, as if she were following a procedure meticulously rehearsed. He noticed because he had worn the same smiles, choked out the same laughs countless times before, until when he meant it and when he didn't blurred into one big mess. Well, maybe that wasn't quite what Lexus was doing. But it reminded him of it, and that was enough to smudge a perfect little crease between his brows.
"I've been told that before, surprisingly enough," the palomino replied, shrugging. "But there you are. Whoever's telling the story has to be a teensy bit morbid to want to recount it, wouldn't you say?" That was the entire point. However blood-curdling the details, people just loved grovelling for sympathy. It was quite sad, really. Ruben grinned again, a ghost of a smile: he was so good at the empathy lark he didn't even have to say anything anymore. He just stood there and looked dejected, and horses assumed he simply had to be tormented.
The palomino lifted his head, muscles complaining, ears twitching uncertainly at her next words. It was kind of sweet of her to ask, he supposed. So concerned and considerate, just like any proper little mare should be. It was sweet, but the effect was kind of ruined by her so obviously not giving a damn.
He'd lost most other things, but his brain hadn't absented itself, and it didn't take much to look past the bland mask she was wearing. Ruben couldn't say he cared. His 'story', if you could call it that, was something of an anti-climax: he was in no mood to reel off his long list of failures to some smart-mouthed mare he had only just met. In his opinion, the mystery was much better: at least then he didn't have to reveal the oh-so-bland truth.
The palomino considered her silently for a moment. He was doing a lot of silent considering lately, it seemed. It sounded better than simply 'stared at blankly'. Anyway. What Lexus was actually trying to get at was beyond him, but for now it was entertaining trying to figure it out. "You first." The words came out, dull and dead, accompanied by the tiniest shake of the head. "Your murdered or else mysteriously vanished relatives have sparked my morbid curiosity."
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Post by Tess›››xo on Apr 16, 2009 3:59:13 GMT -5
“You must be a very well travelled horse, then – or you’ve just listened to those oh-so hard to find, and very reluctant to tell you horses that will spill their unique stories to you?” Her mouth was smiling, but her eyes stayed fixed on Ruben – she wasn’t smiling at her little speech, no, she was grinning because she was one of those horses. And she was shamelessly enjoying any attention she got, and more often than not, the expressions of surprise as she told her story. She was a good, creative story teller, not the kind to let any of the tiniest details fade into the background of her tale. But you already knew that, didn’t you?
He seemed to be going through the same fake, lifeless motions as her, and that pleased her. At least he wasn’t some cheerful chap who would try and convince her to be a smiley, happy person, when that was so impossible. She didn’t show any of this on her face though; she kept a calm, cool face on, and that wasn’t really hard when this was how she spent most of her time. Pleasantly not bothered, by everything that came along.
“Morbid, creative, tormented, self-loathing… I guess they’re all the same when you’re recounting your painful story to complete strangers, even though you obviously don’t want to.” She chuckled, her voice suddenly dropping to a low tenor, as her giggle became a quiet gurgle. It wasn’t an unpleasant sound, but it could hardly be compared to the music of a fast-flowing stream, or whatever other crap laughs supposedly sounded like. The tinkling of a bell, perhaps? No, not quite. Well, whatever it sounded like, it got blown about by the wind, and was lowered to the level that you would imagine a mouse talks at. It was a short laugh, but still, it had changed pitch twice.
“Yes, I’m sure,” she said quietly. Maybe curiosity wasn’t quite the word to be used here – evasive tactics, maybe? Well, since they were both “trying” to escape from coming across as self-absorbed moaners, which they both were, one of them was going to have to go first. Lexus might as well get the ball rolling. She didn’t really know what she was trying to do, but she knew that she hadn’t talked to anyone quite so like her in at least a year, so she should probably jump at the chance.
She wasn’t half strange. The dark bay almost seemed reluctant now. Her moods switched at the playful tug of the wind, or the flicker of the sun behind the clouds, and this was one of those times that she wasn’t so sure. Uncertainty seemed to be the only thing certain in this odd little meeting. “If you want to know, I won’t deny you that.” She frowned. Nobody ever wanted to know. They just got told. Or the listened with mild interest. But at the start of it they didn’t. This perplexed her deeply. But she blew over it, as she blew over everything that confused her.
“I was born, into a pleasant, neutral herd. I had a pleasant upbringing. The horses I lived with were pleasant. But stupid. We were all stupid. It didn’t bother any of us.” She paused. “This is when I give myself the all important lead up to the climax of my shortened speech.” Lexus grinned, jokingly. “Until I was 2 – I woke up one day, and everyone was gone. There was nothing unusual about the day in question, just the lack of life. And not just my herd, but birds, bugs, everything. It wasn’t hard to leave, as you might guess. So, I do what everybody does, I wander, I feel lonely, I join herds, and I leave herds. I followed a friend here but he didn’t know, and I can’t find him. Your turn.”
She didn’t falter once.
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Apr 18, 2009 14:45:05 GMT -5
"What can I say? I'm such a brilliant listener." He returned the grin, and the eyes, too - whoever said a staring match was petty? "These lost and lonely souls just look at me, and they can't spit their tragic stories out quick enough. It's a rare talent I'm lucky enough to possess." And was that a hint of sarcasm there? Oh, surely not, not from King Ruben of the Lights. Well, ex-King Ruben, at any rate. Oh, he missed that title. If you were a king your sulky expression made you brooding and powerful - now he was just a depressed nobody with self-importance issues.
But anyway.
So what if she was enjoying his cynical attention - he couldn't say the presence of another so self-absorbed as himself was doing him any harm. He was vaguely enjoying himself, even if their expressions were as good as cardboard cut-outs and their words just as convincing; at least with her he didn't have to pretend to be genuinely interested in the weather, or cough up some flattery to keep her entertained. So what if they clearly didn't give a toss about one another's problems - Ruben didn't mind a little play-acting.
When he had got quite so unbearable he wasn't sure, he only knew that things had soured up very quickly. And hey, it wasn't as if he was unhappy now. He just didn't take so much empty-headed joy in everything life threw at him, was all, and was that really such a crime? He had been that cheerful, calm, level-headed Light, and it had gotten him jack-all. But really, all this analyzing of his inner self was distracting him from Lexus' big build-up. He returned to her attentively, ears forward, taking in the way her eyelashes fluttered and her lips moved as she talked.
His own mouth formed the perfect 'O' as she reeled off her story. He was somewhat surprised: he had expected several hours of rhyming, action-packed, tear-jerking saga, in which he could doze quietly and give an occasional noise of acknowledgment. Well that would just teach him to judge, wouldn't it? "Obviously you alone were selected for some great and mysterious destiny." Not quite the response he should have given, maybe, but what did she want him to say? "I'm sorry to hear about your family." That's more like it. He wasn't completely heartless.
"Oh, lucky me." He would have made something up, but his imagination really wasn't that good. It wouldn't have been so bad if had had to struggle against the forces of evil and all that bollocks, but the fact of the matter was everything that had happened to him threw him into a rather unsavory light. Ruben looked up, rainwater stinging his eyes, and realized that the miserable weather was in no mood to abate. Not that it mattered, seeing as he was pretty much soaked anyway. He would have bought some time by moving for cover, but it was easier just to come out with some jargon.
"Well, let's see. It all began a long time ago, when I ran off with my father's mate - she was much too young for him, before you start thinking I'm one of those weird toy-boy types. So it was all good, but then she bought it so I ran off - I'm terribly good at that, by the by - and found myself here. Then my new missus - I get around so quickly, don't I? - left me." Here the palomino's lip curled ever so slightly. "Twice." The expression was short-lived, and soon he was grinning again. "Please try to control your excitement."
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Post by Tess›››xo on May 18, 2009 13:15:11 GMT -5
“Rare talent indeed,” she murmured quietly. Her ears were suddenly slanting back, and her neck was tensed awkwardly. Sure, she had spun off that version of her elaborate story in record time. Didn’t mean it wasn’t as painful. Well, painful was slightly melodramatic; it was just a bit uncomfortable. Here’s 30 seconds to tell us your life story, skip the important details and just get down to the nitty gritty, doesn’t matter if it’s pouring salt water in your cuts. Lexus was unusually relaxed today, her self-absorbed bubble of thought keeping her from noticing that yes, she was in a new land, and yes, she didn’t know if she was in dark land, neutral land, light land; seriously, was she that oblivious to her surroundings that she would forget to ask where she was?
She was careless, and this made her more anxious. Her naturally nervous nature was projected in her stance, and her knotted muscles. But this day, of all days, when she was just finding her feet here, she had let this constant surveillance drop. Her head was mid-height, tail swishing lazily at a few horse-flies, a hind leg cocked lazily. Well, it had been. Now she remembered who she was, and where she was, and her head shot up, figure tensing, standing square, although, poised to dart away at any moment. The constant fear of the unknown was debilitating. You’d think she’d be okay with that now, the uncertain; her family and friends had gone in a flash, she had moved from herd to herd, not knowing whether she quite trusted them or not, she had followed somebody without them knowing to this place, and she didn’t know if she was on free land.
Well, her mind grasped unsuccessfully at the possibility that this was in fact free land, and she had unsuspectingly stumbled across it. But in the pit of her stomach, she actually wanted it not to be. She wanted a confrontation, something to take her mind off the fact that she had no idea what to do, or where to go. A distraction. Maybe this conversation? Well, if she stood her worrying about it much longer, this would be a very odd conversation. She straightened herself up, slowly, unravelling the knots in her muscles and letting go of the severity of her stance, lowering her head a fraction, cocking that leg again. Her tail stayed still though, hanging limply by her mud encrusted legs.
She laughed, another short, empty, spurt of sound, and grinned at Ruben. “I bet you were longing for more insight into my horrific story.” She shook her mane out slowly. It was an odd thing to do. She could have winked, or smiled, or laughed. But no. She just moved her head from side to side, until the hairs were moved from their original places. She did not reply to his comment about her destiny. Destiny was a useless word to her. You moulded your own future, and life just gave you helpful--- or unhelpful, nudges. And as for selection, it was more of an unlucky dip than anything else. And, what do you know, Lexus’ name was picked out of the hat. She gave a small smile as she thought of that; she had been picked, by chance, for this life. Like people gave you a group to go into. The ones who made it out sane, and the ones who didn’t. She belonged to the latter group.
“Yeah, so was I, but hey, what you gonna do,” she said absently, her dark eyes darting around the ground, picking out the details of certain rocks. It was something to beat off the impending anxiety and nerves that were sure to wash over her in a great wave any time soon. This was one way to stop her looking like a lunatic, and make her look a little more sad about the fact that she had lost all of her family. Then realising that he had started on his on little tale, she lifted her eyes away from the ground, despite the fact the she might crumple under the strain of not coming off as a complete freak, and listened, quite carefully.
When he had finished her face was a mirror image. He was more exciting than her – more special. It made her want to curl her lip back in disgust, and not talk to him any longer, but she controlled these irrational longings. The perfect o disappeared and she changed her expression into that of mild surprise. “Twice?” Again, resisting rude and abrupt urges, she gave him a genuine look of sympathy. She had never had a mate, but Lexus expected it wouldn’t be very nice to be left. Twice. “I’m very sorry. Sounds like you’ve had it kind of shit, yeah?”
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Post by ..!INZ.z on Jun 5, 2009 13:28:28 GMT -5
It wasn't really painful anymore. He'd gone over it so many times, scrutinized it, stared at it from every angle - he couldn't be upset over it any more, though sometimes he wanted to. It still stung, it was still a dent in his bruised and tattered pride, but Sorrow was gone and this land had long ago ceased to be the place he remembered - he should have moved on with his life before now. But he hadn't, he'd just soured and moped and wallowed in self pity, so that now it wasn't about what had happened in the past - it was just how he was.
He really needed to find some better way to spend his time.
Ruben noticed now that Lexus had tensed. He raised a brow, lifted his nose to catch any intruding scents; finding nothing, he cast a suspicious glance behind him. Again, there was nothing but the flat, bland expanse of grass and the fuzzy tree line, the heavy sky hanging dull above it all; the palomino frowned, casting his eyes back to the mare's inexplicable raised head, tensed muscles, darting eyes. "Alright?" He could think of nothing else to say. Unconsciously the tough muscles that bound his shoulders were tensing, his head inching up - he knew enough of erratic mares to be a little wary.
She relaxed a little, but the palomino continued to watch her closely. He shrugged at her comment. "Morbid curiosity, and all that. You never found any of them again?" He wasn't desperate to know, but he wasn't disinterested either. It did seem a little unusual. The palomino shuffled for what seemed the hundredth time that day, muscles seized up with rain now aching dully. He ground his teeth, but he wasn't going to be the one to suggest moving.
"You can laugh." He didn't mean that, even though he was smiling. Male pride and such - it didn't exactly put him across as a good lover. "Apparently she didn't mean to the first time - she just ran away accidentally." So that wasn't quite true, and maybe he wasn't being fair to her, but hey - it wasn't like she would ever hear this. The palomino shrugged, again. "Some've had it worse. I'm just better at moaning about it than they are."
God, he needed to move. He lifted a hindleg, kicked it out aimlessly. It only made his cold bones complain all the more. He felt so old.
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Post by Tess›››xo on Jun 25, 2009 13:58:46 GMT -5
Lexus shook her head, brow furrowed. Not in the way that said, no, something’s wrong, but like she was telling him to take no notice of her antics. Her maniacal habits were getting on her own nerves, which was odd, considering how Lexus really did like herself. But still, this was getting irritating, this whole living in fear routine. She longed to be a mare that could just let go and not give a shit about who was there and what they were doing, but that wasn’t the way she had been brought up. No, she had been brought up as a prim, proper, if slightly haughty mare, that was never trusting and constantly suspicious – you never know who could be the next freak or killer, as her mother always reminded her. For some strange reason, she found she had the urge to explain herself. Ah well, as long as the topic was about her, yeah?
“Sorry, I’m kind of nervy – new land, y’know...” Yeah, like that was the reason she was so anxious. She had been carrying that lesson around, engraved into her brain, never forgetting that anybody could be somebody wanting to hurt you. But, hey, that was quirky and special, and everything that Lexus wanted to be, correct? Lexus was hoping the answer was yes.
“Nah – don’t get me wrong, I tried, for a little bit, but... no use. Something musta come and panicked them, but, I’ve no idea what that could be that it wouldn’t wake me up.” She had spent hours contemplating several different theories, comparing likeliness, looking at the way things could be done. But, honestly, she was tired of it, and had accepted the fact that they weren’t coming back, and if she ever saw them again it wouldn’t be in this lifetime. Nor, would they be the same horses. She was sure of it. They had to be altered in some ways, if they had abandoned her so readily. The dark bay felt guilty straight after she had even thought the first word. It’s funny, that way, how characters that aren’t even there, change the way you think, what you think, what you say, so deeply, and probably permanently. People you couldn’t see were constantly making you do something differently and usually without you knowing.
Lexus shook her head again, smiling in spite of it. “No, seriously, I’m no dark.” Her eyes glittered for the second time that day – it was a record! “Yes, but there will always be someone who’s had it worse – but those horses are usually those humble, gracious things that are unwilling to burden you with their pitiful and depressing tales. I mean, seriously, that’s no fun!” She grinned, even though she said she hadn’t, shaking her head at the same time. “It’s so weird... I mean, normally horses feel things so passionately – everyone either hates or loves each other. But, it’s sad, I know – but I’ve never had a chance to just talk to someone without them... I don’t know, searching for something else.”
She threw forth a leg, and turned her head to look at Ruben straight on. Lexus hadn’t noticed his constant flexes before, but now that she was actually listening, and paying attention, she could see that the old geezer’s joints were starting to get stiff. “You wanna walk?” It was pretty evident that he did, so Lexus began to walk in a relaxed walk, in her long easy strides, her 15 hand frame swinging from side to side.
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